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There's a few things I never mentioned, it didn't seem important at the time, but it's worth noting...

My home town, is a Wacky Bavarian themed village called Levenworth Wa,  where my father lives with my kid sister, who's about 14... Samuel and Kacie....

I'm bringing this up because after what... what I almost did to Maya, that I needed to, well frankly run away from it all and go somewhere relaxing, and comfortable, I took a few days of vacation time, and I went home to see them. besides the good thing about growing up in a tourist trap, is I can disappear in it.

I took the tablet so I was still able to follow up and read everyone's blogs, but I ignored my own.

While I was there, I had a sit down talk with Dad, while he was working his restaurant up there, we had lunch with Kay and just talked....

He could tell I was sleeping like shit, and called me on it. I dodged what was going on with the Proxies and asked a few questions, he's the basics of the conversation.

"Hey dad, you remember Maya right?"  I asked in between fries

"Yeah I remember her, the young thing you started dating.. what 4 years ago?"

Yes I did the math, I was 26 and she was... 19... which is in of itself creepy.

"Yeah it was actually" I had no idea.

"So um... Dad... Did I ever talk about children with you?"

My dad stopped and gave me a worried look? "You didn't knock her up did you?"

"NO.. No... no... Nothing like that, I was just wondering if I mentioned anything like that"

Kay was snickering at me while playing with her PSP...

"Well then why in the hell are you asking me about it?" Dad asked.

"I don't know dad, after mom and all I know I've been scarred about having a kid myself, because of..." I stop my self there, my sis had to go through some early life grief counseling because my mother had died during childbirth with her.

"I think your just worried about losing Maya, or are your worried about committing to her? You don't shut up about her, why are you worried about this with her?"

So I'm happy with her then? Could Hoody have got to my family as welll?

"I'm thinking about it Dad, she really is an amazing woman" I smile and say, I'm sure if I didn't have a missing family that I would be quite taken in by her.

That was the conversation, I spent the night with them, Helped my Dad with some of the cleaning around the house, spent some time playing Angry Birds with my sister on the tablet, it's okay I took down the Operator background down from it, and ended up coming home tonight.

I feel refreshed, honestly, just a little time away from it all really steeled my resolve. I feel, Calm.. Like the world makes a little sense, getting an outside perspective from someone I would confide in about Maya helped.

Of course if this all Proxy brainwashing, then who the fuck knows, that's what Ryan would say right?

Now that I'm back in Tacoma, Maya, who was trying to reach Hoody, or "Antonio" texted me to let me know she's had no luck, the guy's laying low... of course do I believe that?

What do I believe? Do I believe my memories? in the face of a whole world telling me there wrong? Do I believe my dad? Who might be just as brainwashed as everyone else? How about Ryan? who's out there building an army to "retake the city?"

I don't trust Maya, I don't remember her well enough to trust, and Ryan...  he's pulling an "Alex" on me right now, so fuck all knows what's going on with him.

So let me get the responds from the last posts comments done....

Manic, I didn't get up in arms about the insulation about my family not existing, was, well your normally are spot on with your theories, I've known my family for a hell of a lot longer than I've known about the slenderman, they have to be real on those grounds alone.

Lucia, I know I said this once, but yeah I'm keeping as calm head on my shoulders now, I don't have a choice. If I lose it again, I might do something regretful and I want to leave this mess able to look myself in the mirror.

Ryan, play it cool man, I don't need the entire Tacoma PD knocking on my door because you got a mob together and lynched someone who might of been innocent, yes I know he's a proxy, but so what? If your reading other blogs, then you know not all of them are bad.

Now the next question on my mind, do I let Maya know about the blog? If Hoody, knows about the blog, does that mean she does as well?