It's amazing what sitting against the rock staring at the sea as dawn breaks can do for one's soul.
Anna and I have now been here several days, she's trying to be as supportive as she could be, I still feel like I need to keep her skills up, but it's not for the desperate reasons I had before, it's not out of anger like it was before...
I wonder if I'm coming to terms with everything.
I still have the nightmares, and I still barely sleep... I don't feel like I've done anything to be forgiven for my crimes... I'm still baddy repressing allot of the pain for the sake of being the tough stoic son of a bitch Anna needs me to be right now.
As much as she doesn't admit to it... She's scared..... We both are... I'm scared that I'm going to get her killed... She's scared that her dying will kill me...
Pretty justified all things considered.
We haven't seen any sign of Slendy or any proxies right now... which is good... I definitely don't need that... but about half an hour ago I saw that Sane might be dead right now... Gargoyle is going fucking insane... and Lucia is still burdened by grief...
Then I realize that were going to loose more before the end....
The thoughts make me tempted, tempted to never leave the beach, but we can't do that, were going to have to travel again sooner rather than later....
I have unfinished business of course.....
But I'm not ready to leave... I need more time, and I plan on taking it....
I can't leave here until I can finally close my eye without seeing there faces....
She still isn't ready, she has yet to experience the pain of a runner losing those close to them, she still hasn't seen someone die. You know the more you put it off the worse it will be when it happens. The beach? It sounds nice, I would like to see a beach like that one last time.
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